DAY 315

musing on being present

favourite photo monday: stillness

DAY 273

"The rose is without why, it blooms because it blooms,
It pays no attention to itself, asks not whether it is seen"

Angelus Silesius

I´ve been a long time without thinking of this quote which I read long ago as student and also because it was one of the favorite quotes of Jorge Luis Borges, and I was very fond of his books when I was much younger

But while I was editing the last photos I took in the park, and I saw this one it came clearly to my mind as a sort of epilogue of a previous post. This way my photo walk, my current musings and my past learnings have shown themselves beautifully connected

In this case, what triggered this connection was the back story of this photo: when I arrived to the small garden of roses inside the park, I found that most of the roses were ruined due to high temperatures, but amid the chaos of burnt petals and dry buds, this rose was flowering peacefully and caught my attention

This happens to me more often every passing day. I am doing something and suddenly I find out a new nexus between two things previously independent, and this is an awesome mode to understand the beautiful harmony of my path 

There is a short of clever symmetry that goes through all the events of my life and makes them relevant in a given moment, no matter what I thought about them before. Things seem to be constantly moving and acquiring new meanings as I go into this journey in depth. It´s amazing  

It´s like all the random episodes, the important events, the accidents, the traumatic experiences, the mistakes, the miracles, the coincidences and so on were fitting in a biggest plan. It´s a wonderful feeling 


Does this happen to you, too?


favourite photo monday: a rose power 

DAY 259

midmorning

a couple of icecream´s teaspoonful

a nice new bowl (has anyone else -apart from me- an obsession with bowls?)

polka dots placemat

a stool and a tidy table

two sweet kitties loafing around

tranquility

silence

light

half free hour to enjoy this moment quietly

mind, heart (and camera) ready to capture the essence of the day

bliss

Life can be hectic, and can seem unfair sometimes. It´s indeed hard, but there is always something unique (that often doesn´t depend on economic or social privileges but on appreciation) which rescues us from the sense of oppression and brings back the sense of purpose

Things like that help us to balance our vision by providing us a sweetest perspective. Through this little gifts and pleasures we realize that life is also interesting, appealing and marvelous




favourite photo monday: simple pleasure

DAY 245

the path of memory

This coffee pot belonged to my mother, it´s a present from my father when they married, it´s the only piece remaining of a whole set and it doesn´t have even its lid. The cups and plates were broken very soon not only because they were used very often, but also because one time my mother left them in a house my family had by the sea after the summer, and when she came back most of the pieces were broken after a party hosted by my father´s brother. She told me that she even find some cups outside the house, near the rocks and the sand

She took the coffee pot with her and she kept it for more than sixty years. Of course, she couldn´t use it, but she wanted to have it anyway, because it reminded her that stage of her life, with its ups and downs, its sour and sweet memories

In fact, this simple piece of crockery is linked to lots of memories and have allowed my mother to outline years that I hadn´t lived because I am the youngest child. By listening my mother, that time became  a part of my life, not as old stories, but as real experiences. I know that this can sound strange: this was my mother´s youth and the childhood of my siblings, not mine, I didn´t live those years because I am much younger than those who indeed lived them, but regardless how foolish it can sound, I internalized them as my own memories, and believe me or not, they left a lasting impression on my psyche

Maybe this happened at the very beginning because I needed childish references when I was a child, my father was dying and everything around moved me to grow fast, and my siblings’ stories about their childhood (often too sweetened) were as good as any other. And later on, because I needed justification for why my young life seemed to go adrift and somehow I had to have the life of an adult

Anyway, when I started this healing journey I had to heal those memories which were stuffed with lies, secrets, misunderstandings and resentment that couldn´t be mine, apart from love, laughs, fun and hopes that were not mine, either (I know...)

A few months ago I asked my mother for this coffee pot

She was a bit amazed because she thinks it´s something too old and ordinary. But I have always loved it and it holds a deep symbolic meaning at this moment of my life. It still triggers lots of memories, but now I can tell the difference between memories of other persons and my own memories which are about the afternoons I spent listening, sharing, dreaming, enjoying, feeling and trying to figure out the meaning of the events... and in any case, I can look at them without anger

Hopefully, I could treasure it at least forty years more


favourite photo monday: symbol

DAY 238

awakening to full trust

Tiny steps around the park, thinking that peace is avoiding me, wanting to breathe without success, leaving my mind carries me to nowhere, trying to shake the fear out, feeling disconnected from the greater reality, and emotionally estranged from any joy of living

Tiny steps around the park trying to recover faith and confidence. And suddenly I started to see a red rug along my path. I looked up and I saw those bare branches blooming like there was no tomorrow. Blooming confidently, humbly, joyfully

Hundreds of little red flowers  were full open and around them tiny buds and withered petals. Hundred of them were falling all over my path. I couldn´t see just a simple leaf, only tons of the most lovely flowers, proud of their fleeting beauty and showing the most amazing lack of concern about future

And this unpretentious act of faith touched my soul and brought me back to the place where I should be, a place of radiance and gentleness where fear can´t last long


favourite photo monday: red

DAY 216

when everything fall into place

I´ve been a few weeks without going outside to explore around with my camera. First, I sprained my ankle then my schedule at work started to be too hectic and the weather was too hot... but finally this weekend I managed to go for a walk and it was marvelous

It was like I was connected to the world heartbeat.  I had the sense that all the things around me and time were expanding a minute and they were becoming shorter and tighter the following one. And I realized that this sort of repetition was the earth´s energy made by sounds, colors, movements, sparkles of light, scents and textures: layers upon layers of meaning and beauty

For a moment I held my respiration and I noticed that I could harmonize my energy with the regular rhythm of nature and just then, a wave of life rose high and came to dwell in my heart...


favourite photo monday:  amazement