16.7.12

DAY 266

mending the fracture

Past week was a restless week with lots of emotional ups and downs. However, I experimented little –and almost invisible- transformations that are having a deep impact on me

I started the week feeling disquieted and tense without apparent reason. Although I managed to discover some haven of peace along the days, as the week went by I started to find my unease and my resistance unpleasant and discouraging

I was wondering why I need to keep sentiments, roles, attitudes and behaviors that I don´t find meaningful anymore and I don´t even want to preserve, when I decided to stop once and for all

Suddenly I realized that deep inside I was not interested on keep up with that discussion; I don´t wanted to know the reason why I was doing this or that, I just wanted to let go all the complexity and move forward. I felt that, sure enough, I  only  wanted to be easy. As easy as I knew I was able to be if I only could liberate myself...

When I decided to stop my inner dialogue, my complains and my powerless mood, I realized that the only one who can give me permission to fly is me and as soon I understood that, I was fully aware of what I was doing: I was longing for being the person that I already am (!)

Yes, I am already courageous, wise, creative, playful, attentive, kind, mature, precious, grateful, truthful, serene…

I am blissfully improving myself in order to be even better, but I am not defective. I am already complete 

4 comments:

Introverted Art said...

your photo looks stunning. you are stunning and this post found me standing exactly where you are: at the decision to let go of the damaging inner dialogue, to to spreading your wings, to being this wonderful individual you are. Keep it coming, I feel so honored to be able to "share" this journey with you.

S said...

The damaging inner dialogue can paralyze us...all that we are -beautiful, vibrant, creative,honest, soulful, emotional, funny...all that we are- gets buried under this negative inner dialogue and our "true self" gets hidden/lost. We become "somebody else" not us. So, let us be what we are and what we are capable of by challenging this negative inner dialogue with some positive, self affirmative ones.

I have been thorough this phase...I am facing this inertia from time to time...and only the awareness of "who I really am and what I should be" is rescuing me from this phase.

Unknown said...

Sometimes its best to just let it go! You look so beautiful!

Deborah Tisch said...

Very powerful words, and they resonate with me. I find myself in that same place, shaking off the pretense and celebrating my true self. Thank you for sharing your journey.

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