1.6.12

DAY 221

blessed

This is my contribution to photo-heart connection this month. Perfectionist, indecisive and a bit obssesive as I am, I usually take a lot of photos and even lots of takes of the same scene, because I always see new details or want to capture a new angle or preserve a different light... so past months I haven´t enjoyed myself when I had to choose only one, although the photos I had selected as being the most heartfelt and significant were only a few

Even so, I have appreciated this practice very much because part of my inner work involves dealing with my perfectionism which means dealing with decision making, taking the risk of being mistaken and accepting that this, anyway, won´t be so important (challenges are not easy when you want to do the right things at all costs)

But this month my experience has being completely different. I think this has happened due to two different reasons:

First, all the things I have been doing lately (publishing my photos, writing this blong, defying myself to try new things...) have increased my self-confidence, my openness and flexibility

Second, since I edited this photo I knew this would be my may´s choice. 



I took it by chance, last wednesdayDuring the morning I phoned my mom´s house because the day before she didn´t feel well and my brother told me that she was in the hospital because she was suffering an stomach upset. I phoned my sister, who was with her, and she told me that doctors wanted to keep our mom under observation 

And suddenly I felt totally anxious and frightened. I didn´t know really why... well, my mom is 87 years old and if I want to go to visit her I have to go by plane (one hour flight), but really news wasn´t that bad. However, all kind of negative thought went through my mind and I felt like crying... indeed, I cried a bit 

At certain moment I became aware of my attitude (I was slipping into drama so fast!) and decided to calm myself down. So I went to my altar, a place where I meditate and pray and lighted a candle... and there, this orchid was flowering, like a godsend that called for tranquility, thankfulness and hope 


Late that evening, at half past eight, my mom left the hospital and went home. She was diagnosed as having gastro-enteritis. She is a bit weak at this moment but feeling a lot better

18 comments:

leanne can blog said...

Glad that this flower had a calming effect, (it's a beautiful colour) & that your mum was ok.

Kathryn Dyche said...

What a beautiful thing to find, just when you needed it the most. Love the image.

Susan said...

Beautiful image and prayers for your mom and your family. Isn't it wonderful that this art of photography can affect us in such a positive manner in so many aspects of our life. Thank you for sharing.

Kathryn Zbrzezny said...

Gorgeous photo. I hope your Mom is feeling much better today.

Sandra said...

What a lovely and well-captured orchid, such a vibrant and intense colour too!
How clever of you to be aware of the fact that you were "slipping into drama so fast" with the news of your mother's hospitalization. You found your quiet meditative corner and a candle and this gorgeous flowering orchid which helped you back to serenity.
I am happy to read that your mum is back home and on the mend. All is well!

chelle said...

Zena, what a beautiful image so vibrant & full of life! I agree with Sandra how wonderful that you were able to realise you were slipping in into drama & take some time to quiet your mind. I am happy that your mum is feeling better.

Simon said...

Wow. Great post. I'm glad to hear your mother is doing better. I too can be a perfectionist, over do, and jump to stress and anxiety. My grandmother used to say "the worst of your worries never come true"...it would soothe. I don't know if it is true, but when we can't control those things anyway, it does help settle the stress.
Hope your mom continues to improve...and your "one" shot flower came out beautifully. Might print and frame as a reminder of how to stay calm when the invariable stress comes along.

Karen @ Pieces of Contentment said...

Taking a time to pray really helps centre your world again. Your orchid photo is very symbolic for you this month.

nancyjean said...

so glad your mom is home again and doing much better. i find it so hard at times watching my dear mother age, she too is almost 87. It is hard to image life without her. Your photo is so beautiful, peaceful and calming

irene said...

beautifully expressed in words and through your image. I love the reds! you have come full circle from perfection and obsession to acceptance. that is a blessing.

Lori said...

Beautiful image. I commend you for realizing your slip into drama and having the strength to calm yourself through taking photos. Lovely. So glad that you Mom was able to go home quicker than expected.

Kat Sloma said...

I am so glad that your Mom is doing ok! I am also very impressed and encouraged that you were able to see the drama in the moment and find a way to calm yourself. That is so hard to do! This is a beautiful image filled with wonderful colors, and I'm glad you have shared it with us in the Photo-Heart Connection. Picking one image is so hard to do, but you seem to be gaining much from it!

Deborah Tisch said...

I appreciate how in your moment of stress you took the time to meditate at the altar you prepared. Glad to know your mother is doing well.

Elsie said...

Great flower photo, fine it helps you to get out of stress when making your beautiful flowers. Wishing all the best with your mom, greetings from the Netherlands, Elsie

Unknown said...

Thank you for sharing your thoughts here, your words resonate do deeply with my own feelings. I can imagine how you were feeling about your mother...I was unable to reach my mother by phone recently, and found myself crying...she was fine, but I had managed to ruin my day, just with thoughts!

Your writing and photos inspire me...sending good wishes...xo

Becs said...

I love this post, beautiful image and beautifully written. I'm so glad your mum is OK.
I especially love your description of what this beautiful orchid represents to you. A true heart connection.

Cathy H. said...

Beautiful, touching image and story! So glad you have a place of calmness and beauty!

MaggieGem said...

A lovely image, great color! Glad all is well with your Mom, these things can be so upsetting. It can difficult to calm oneself, but looks like you did just fine... Thanks for sharing!

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