25.12.11

DAY 62

everything in its own good time

Today I am 47 years old. As my birthday coincides with Christmas Eve, I haven´t celebrated it properly since I was a child. I´ve been used to become absorbed in Christmas feasts instead of paying attention to the anniversary of the day of my birth. But since I started this journey, I became aware of the great importance of honoring the time I spend here and the inflexion point that every birthday meant, because when we celebrate it we don´t only mark a significant event, but we also praise publicly the chance for being here and be part of all this 

Indeed, being here is a miracle and a privilege, an incredible way of learning, and the most favorable set of circumstances to develop our latent qualities and abilities

So since it was my fortieth birthday (or so) I try to make a pause in the midst of Christmas Day to examine my own condition and evolution. This checking is not about goals, purposes and intentions, it´s about verifying how happy I am being in my own shoes... so it´s about growing up and involves musings (and ramblings) on memories, present challenges, past sorrows, fears... in other words, on the process of being myself, and on the stage where I am right now

I´m starting the year 47th of my life having the following successes by my side:

 a stronger feeling of being connected to my own life

 a more creative way to explore my path where visibility plays a main role

a clearer perception of its beauty

a more benevolent relationship with myself

a more confident behavior

and more awareness about my aims

But maybe the most significant learning has been that this year -for the very first time in my life- I´m saying a loud and clear YES to my own vision, which has been hidden for so long now

Of course, there has been also some failures, things that I haven´t overcome, some fears that I´ll have to face up along the coming years but according to my experience, life will give me new (and even more adequate) chances to get over them, and what is more important, I´ll keep on trying it 

Before, I used to think that I had started this path too late, that I had lost my best years without awaken to a more sane way of living... but now I know everything happens in the right moment and I truly believe that these are, indeed, the best years of my life. Celebrate with me

here: the homemade old bread pudding & golden syrup that I had instead of the typical birthday cake

2 comments:

Sam said...

Happy birthday to you, dear Zena! Oh, how I loved this post. We are the same age (well, I'm a couple months older than you :) and we seem to be on such a similar path. Maybe that is why I felt an almost instantaneous connection with you.

I am so happy that I have "met" you and gotten to know you through your lovely photos & words. They reveal how beautiful you are inside & out!

I celebrate YOU! xx

JuxtaposeJane said...

Happy birthday...I marked my 55th birthday earlier in December, and I am happy to report that is indeed not too late, and that I have found that with each year that passes, I am more free to be myself. I, too, used to mourn lost opportunities of my younger years. More recently, I am more sanguine. The younger me had not yet grown to the point I could participate fully or take some of the required risks. That just is what it was.

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